(dimas & gestas clothes)

An indignant Christ turns against the wall with his forgotten crucifixion companions Dismas & Gestas. There, suspended on their feet, almost weightless, some say they look like a synchronised swimming team on the verge of a dive that will never happen. In his article “crime and ornament”, Adolf Loos said “The first ornament that emerged, the cross, is of erotic origin. The first work of art, the first artistic activity that an artist daubed on a wall, was to wipe off his excesses (he refers to his faeces). A horizontal line: the reclining woman. A vertical line: the man who penetrates her. He who created this image felt the same impulse as Beethoven, was in the same heaven in which Beethoven composed the Ninth Symphony”. We know little of the way in which an Asian god appropriated this erotic emblem, making it an object of torture for him (painful death) and for Christians (infinite guilt). We have lived with this object for centuries, with it presiding not only over churches but also classrooms and squares and facades of houses. It is high time to find a use for it, and in this sacrilegious landfill of delights we offer to recycle it into this practical coat hook for your home. “Thank you, Lord, for holding our coat!” your happy guests will exclaim. “Praise the lord for looking after my hat”, “Long live Christ, who kept my jacket safe.” But remember, Christ is God, but Dismas and Gestas were expert thieves! This rear view of the Crucifixion is unprecedented in the world of art and yet it refers us both to an imaginary reality in which an inhabitant of Galilee walked down the hill past this place, seeing Christ’s back, and also to a new symbolism in which the Son of God looks at the horizon, alone, and leaves man to his fate. And how can these facts from the distant past in Asia prove useful to the joyful inhabitants of today? Well it is clear; we have solved with it a nice practical clothes hook which, although it is not necessary, is very convenient for not leaving everything lying on the floor. Moreover, it is possible that the in-laws may be religious and will keep conveniently away from this heresy like vampires and we can celebrate this “permanent absence of the in-laws” with our wildest friends as the best of all possible situations, offering up wine and beer to the ancient goddesses who insulted this one-in-three god by calling him ‘the monkey’.